230421 What I learned in my studies this morning 3

Lunging for the first.
A second falls unnoticed.
Multiple parenting.

Thoughts:

“There’s an almost inevitable failure built into caring for two people during a moment when one is in crisis and one is not. Because while you may love those people equally, with a fierceness unique to each, you must throw your arms out to catch the one who is failing, and that means you’re not there to catch the other, should they fall too.” ~ Mary Laura Philpott, Bomb Shelter*

When a crisis demands my attention, remember, when things calm, to check on and support those who were not the injured / endangered party.

That sibling that's been (temporarily) neglected? Maybe they're scared to death because their brother or sister almost died.  Or they're angry because this "crisis" turned out to be not much of anything and they've had X, Y, and Z go wrong in their life. No one noticed them for the duration. Or they're frustrated because the sick person has completely monopolized our time for days or weeks or months or years now.

Just because they weren't part of The Problem, doesn't mean that they aren't having problems of their own.

Check on them.  Remind them I love them and support them and care for them.  Make sure they know that even though my time is taken up right now, I remember them and they matter to me.

Today's Meditation:

Today's Meditation II:

Today's Meditation III:

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* Adapted from Ryan Holiday's Daily Stoic email 230420