Today's Meditation(s): My partner gets the benefit of the doubt . If there's more than one way to interpret something, especially an emotional something, and one way of looking at it assumes that whatever happened was innocent — an accident, a mistake, an overreaction — rather than malfeasance, then I must accept that version unless proven otherwise. It's a foundational premise on which my spouse and I built our relationship and it has forestalled many a dispute between us. And yesterday I failed to do that. One of the Stoics great points was to insert some time before we act. In Frankl's words, "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." In Haidt's metaphor, it allows time for the elephant to be thwarted, to be turned back to the rational path by the rider. And, in the 10 minutes I had between a phone call and meeting in person, I failed both of these...

Today's Meditation(s): Discourses 2.5, 6-8 by Epictetus (Waterfield) The things are indifferent. What I do with them is not: I can use a gun villainously or valiantly. I can run an organization ruthlessly or responsibly. I can spend money wickedly or wisely. All of those involve preference and choice. These are things that are  mine. These are things that cannot be taken from me. I can relinquish them, but they cannot be taken.

Today's Meditation(s): Discourses 2.4, 10-11 by Epictetus (Dobbin) Interesting non sequitur . Anyway.... I have to do more than study. I have to live what I learn. I have to practice my Stoicism. I have to take being a prokopton seriously.

Today's Meditation(s): Discourses 2.2, 21 by Epictetus (Waterfield) ( This one's going in the book. I'd forgotten about it. ) Learn the basics, set my foundation, build slowly, practice . . . flow. When I get confused or uncertain, go back to the beginning: what is up to me? what is consistent with reason? what follows Nature? what can wisdom, justice, courage, and temperance offer? are my values focused on the right thing? And my own: am I being kind?

Today's Meditation(s): Discourses 2.1, 40 by Epictetus (Waterfield) And I get it wrong. Acting as though nothing is at stake when judging internal states with ease and assuredness while approaching things that don't matter with consummate care. My virtue is dependent on only of of there. Perhaps that's where my concern should be, too.

Today's Meditation(s): Discourses  2.1, 23-24 by Epictetus (Waterfield) Tolle lege! Tolle lege! Come and feast upon the banquet set before us by the philosophers! The world would be a better place if we did.... Thats how I avoid the error Epictetus mentions above. I learn to spot it in myself. I deliberately go looking for it. I try to rid myself of it and live a wiser life. It doesn't always work. It may not work most of the time. But it does work some. And, when I'm doing well, thinking and paying attention it works better. And each step of my journey is progress.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations, 12.36 (Hicks and Hicks) Accept, revel , what comes. If it's going to suck, correct that by leaning in, by making it the best I can. Make it good. If it's already happened, go with it, find my way, find my new place  and purpose. But come back to visit every once in a while.....eh?

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12.35 (Hicks and Hicks) Death holds no terrors for one like this? I should think not. Love fate. Do good; don't worry about quantity. Stop caring whether my time left is long or short. Yeah,that last one seems different. But how? Emotionally. Yeah. And? But like I said, it feels different. What's that to following reason and Nature? I hsve things I want to do. Plans I want to fulfill. People I want to be here for and with. I have more good things to do. More to experience. More to make. More to give.  People who would be sad without me. People who would be hurt without me. People who would be harmed without me. And they will continue without you as you've continued without your son, your father, and your mother. And before that, when you lost A and B? And when you've lost people from your life even without death? The world goes on. All those things still happen — will still happen — when you're gone. The only diff...

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12.32 (Hicks and Hicks) I am less than small. I am less than temporary. I will leave no trace in less than 100 years. I'm ok with that. It means I need to find meaning in life on my own. It's not 'out there' waiting to be discovered. It's in here waiting to be . . . created. To be written thought adapted crafted imagined. Made. And I've accepted that responsibility. And if I fail, I fail. But the Emperor has some good points up there which I can lean on to help me through tough, existentialist times. Abd there's more besides that. And there are more people than only those who died two thousand years ago.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12.29 (Hicks and Hicks) The true joy of stacking one good deed upon another ? I love this! And what a beautiful sounding life. Reminder: opportunities.

Today's Meditation(s): “There are always more of them before they are counted.” U. S. Grant (as reported in Courage is Calling by Ryan Holiday)  Occam's Razor + practicality In the case Grant was referring to (estimating how many wolves followed him and his companion), it was literally a case of not multiplying entities beyond necessity: when questioned, Grant estimated twenty possible pursuers during their frightened flight . . . only to find out in the end that the predators numbered but two. So find out. If that isn't possible, then eliminate my speculations or, at least, limit them to the barest slivers of attention. Focusing on my fear and building up the unknown are both paths to ruin. Rather, examine those things I know to be the case and remain as close to them as possible as I work through my situation. I am not guaranteed success, but I am guaranteed that I'm using the best approach available to me, giving me my best shot at it.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12.27 (Hicks and Hicks) Amor fati . Again? Already? Good! Because I need it. I always need the reminder.  Sometimes it's not my day. Ok. Crap. This sucks. And? Run along, get on, or get dragged. Take my pick, but there are no other options and I must make a choice. Now.... Make it  MY choice, my true choice, in my heart and mind. Now use this choice and turn it into good. For myself. For others. For all.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12.26 (Hicks and Hicks) If I have forgo my opinion, then whatever was an issue is now properly, morally indifferent. As such, it can be treated rationally, following Nature, to best effect . . . even if that means rejection, ignoring, or otherwise not engaging the issue.

Today's Meditation(s): "Lead me, O Zeus, and thou O Destiny, to the goal that you have marked for me. I will follow without hesitation; but even if I would not, I still must follow, suffering." ~ Cleanthes 'prayer Amor fati. I can either trot along beside the cart, or be dragged regardless. It's my choice of the manner, but not the destination or the path.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12 24 (Hicks and Hicks) We do the same things over and forever. Pettiness, ambition, carelessness, savagery, ignorance, hard-heartedness, grift, cruelty. We do these all. Every day. Every where. Every time. Every person. Even those who try to be virtuous, we fail. We snap. We curse. We reject. We refuse. Hopefully less than our brethren, but it still happens. We play our games we envy and plot and hurt and destroy. People. Things. The planet. How could viewing all this not taint a soul?

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations, 12.23 (Hicks and Hicks) "There is a time to every purpose under Heaven." When that time comes, I hope I have the courage to meet it with grace and goodwill. Now to remake my life such that I can be more confident in my aims.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12.22 (Hicks and Hicks) Control my judgments and control my thoughts. So much depends on buying time, on spotting and widening the space between stimulus and response, so that my emotions stop leading my mind astray. Pausing helps. More than most anything else, pausing helps.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12.21 (Hicks and Hicks) Memento mori .  There's no such thing as a legacy beyond a generation or so and perhaps a hundred years. And that's if you are extraordinarily lucky. Past lucky. Statistically beyond the pale. Do good now. Be known for my good now, instead of hoping for recognition later. Neither is up to me, but one is much more likely to have a positive impact on my community and to fulfill my desire to be excellent.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations, 12.20 (Hicks and Hicks) We should benefit the whole. It should be as automatic as my desire to see the person first. If I can train myself in that approach, I can train myself in this.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12.19 (Hicks and Hicks) What is driving me? Whether it's to eat too much or to seek inebriation or to snap at a kid or give half effort on a tadh. Doesn't matter. Identifying the source of the impulse will help me take the time to control it better. So take the time!

Today's Meditation(s): " Cry once and remember it forever. " (My friend on why he spends freely on friends and experiences.)  He's collecting memories, experiences with his favorite people. Saving it cost one their virtue, it's not a bad way to approach life.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12.18 (Hicks and Hicks) A reminder to use reason to understand. To look at the roots and the scope. The hows and the whys. It's not always about ethics.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations , 12.17 (Hicks and Hicks) Nice when it's pithy. And clear. And clearly right. A top ten entry.

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations, 12.14 (Hicks and Hicks) Nothing can take my virtue, my excellence, without my capitulation. Everything else is hostage to the whims of physics and power, fate and fortune. But my mind is my own. " Take my love, take my land Take me where I cannot stand I don't care, I'm still free You can't take the sky from me " Firefly Theme (by Sonny Rhodes)

Today's Meditation(s): Meditations, 12.9 (Hicks and Hicks) Take my tools with me. Discernment. Reason. Wisdom. Justice. Courage. Temperance. Acceptance. Concern. Generosity. Care. Kindness.