231006 What I learned in my studies this morning 3

Stoic displays of
Emotion are tools to urge
The crowd to action.

Today's Meditation(s):

If I do not feel harmed, I am not harmed.  Change your mind, change your reality.

The more I can forgive, understand, tolerate, and ignore, the happier I will be.

But but but . . . people will just walk all over you!

No. That's not what that means.

Failing to be offended by what someone says doesn't mean I must do nothing.  Failing to get angry with someone who disappointed me doesn't mean I won't fix the problem and take steps to prevent future ones.

Rather, it means that I can act to counter those things without letting the monkey drive the bus.

Although not exactly accurate, a useful rule of thumb goes:

Neo-cortex = human brain
Limbic system = monkey brain
Cerebellum = lizard brain

• The Neo-cortex controls rational thought, speaking and other higher brain functions.
• The Limbic System controls emotions and a whole lot more.
• The Cerebellum controls movement and action.

Technically speaking the monkey and the lizard don’t ‘think’ — at least not in the sense of rational and logical thought. But that doesn’t stop us from believing that we are being reasonable when they are ‘driving the car.’

 
The Neo-cortex seldom totally abandons us. This is why even someone who is exceedingly drunk can still talk. But that doesn’t mean we are functioning in that part of our brain. Or that our behaviors are rational, logical or even under our conscious control.*

Instead of reacting rashly, saying or doing something which I cannot undo or take back, I allow myself the benefit of remaining calm and rational (assuming I succeed in my Stoic efforts) while I deal with the situation. In many cases, this will resolve into "ignore them" (the simplest way of dealing with a blowhard). 

Whether I shun them or actively respond to the issue at hand, in either case, my attempts to find a positive resolution will only be helped by my remining unaffected and thinking clearly.

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* While the monkey brain doesn’t exactly ‘think,’ it does process emotionally. Where it starts getting complicated is in a generalized way ‘thoughts precede emotions.’ But not necessarily in ‘the more I think about it the madder I get’ sense (although that is part of it too).

A huge factor is ‘how you think in the long term’ directs your emotional responses.

We’re not talking about a single thought here (e.g. the cat knocked the glass over). What we’re talking about is your  long established thought patterns determine your emotions. How you think directs how you feel.

Imagine your emotions like water. These long term ‘thinking patterns’ channel your emotions (and thoughts) down certain pathways. And this happens without you consciously knowing it. Like rain running off a roof and down a drain spout, you only become aware of it when it comes gushing out.

Have you ever had an emotion faster than conscious thought?  Who hasn’t? Someone says something and you’re immediately angry. Then you have a moment to ‘think about it’ and you calm down — when you realize that the person didn’t mean what you thought he said. That is an example of emotional processing being guided down certain pathways and you consciously stopping the process.

Often however, people DON’T stop the process, they just react as if their feelings reflect actuality. Not only that, but they react as though their emotions are conscious and rational. (Have you ever told someone to be reasonable and they hysterically scream “I AM BEING REASONABLE!”?)