250320 What I learned in my studies this morning 5**

Today's Meditation(s):

Letters on Ethics by Seneca, LXXVII.10-11 (Graver)

Seneca has come back to the topic of not fearing death several times in recent letters. I wonder if anything was going on with Lucillius or if this was instruction for future use?

Thrice now, I have killed myself in my dreams.

The first time, I had a sword and the only way to handle the situation was to plunge it through my heart. Knowing it would kill me, I immediately made the thrust and the dream ended. No hesitation. Decision became action in the same moment.

The next, I leapt from a cliff. Again, once the signs were satisfied — the die cast, 'Caesar, the river crossed' — I went. The need was urgent and my life unimportant cf what was at stake. It was an easy choice.

(I remember of the third only that it happened. No details survive.)

I hope I am as steadfast when my time comes.