Fireflies lie dormant, But hopes and prayers live yet still. Spring comes soon in truth. Thoughts: My eldest child turned 18 today. A shock to my feelings, no doubt. Cliché or not, time really does seem to have raced by without the attention it deserves. So much joy. So much pride. So much fear. One of the gifts I work at giving all my kids is philosophy. It's important to me that they learn to think, to doubt, to support, to make sure they not only know who they are but also know why they are who they are. I want to give them a headstart in life by instilling habits which have served me so well, but which I didn't come by until much later in life. I wish I'd had these blessings when I was younger. They might have helped me create an even better life than I have. We study many Stoic thoughts, but I make sure to include other philosophies. I would love for them to discover that the values I hold most deeply are also the ones they feel drawn to, but my goal is not to impri...

The work of man is To love one another as Brother to brother. Thoughts: I helped my eldest child with an assignment tonight. They were writing an essay analyzing a poem and I was thrilled that they asked me to look at it and help them make it better.  While we worked on it, I was surprised just how much it bothered me to be restricted by the grading rubric the professor used. I understand why instructors for lower-level English courses insist students follow strict standards — beginers need to learn the rules before they can break those rules in interesting and effective ways — but, as someone who is has reached that higher level, it was humbling to have to swallow my pride and revert to such a limited format. Even so, I feel like I did a good job coaching them rather than writing it for them. I gave advice about organization, transitions, word choice, linguistic flourishes, and the like, but the real content was all theirs.  Beyond the quality of their thoughts, I was imme...

Smorgasbord today. Heaping helpings of broad topics. You never know what's . . . . Thoughts: "Your kids know that your job is important, they know people are counting on you…but they still miss you. They know you’re doing your best…but that doesn’t change the fact that they have unmet needs." ~ The Daily Dad I try to be an attentive father.  But reality is not always what I try to make it.  Usually because I'm there screwing it up. Maybe I'm tried and I just want to sit on the couch and watch TV.   Maybe I am just not up for bedtime tonight and I skip one of my favorite things: reading bedtime stories with them. Maybe they're asking me to come outside, but it's a little chilly so I demur. Maybe they're asking me to play a game with them, but my hip is bugging me so I beg off. Maybe I'm supposed to do a lesson with one (usually a philosophy lesson of all things), but my mind isn't feeling it today so I don't mention it and the scheduled tim...

Bear. Also forbear. Assent. But also be wise Act. And with all love. .  Thoughts: I sabotage myself. I actively think to myself as I do the wrong thing, "Don't do this. I can stop this." But I don't.  I wonder why I do this to myself....  Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: Overture from Die Meistersinger von Nürnberg - The Mastersingers of Nuremberg by Richard Wagner Today's Shakespeare: Troilus and Cressida , Act 5 scene 5

Passions leap to fore In an instant, tempting minds To dance to their tune. Thoughts: Another day, another admonition to use your emotions for good rather than let them lead you into error and counterproductive actions.  It's almost as if ancient Stoics thought this was important....  I watched the video of a road rage incident this morning.  A guy took a bat to another car.  His bond was $20k.  Charged with criminal mischief, menacing, and possession of an illegal weapon.  Facing large fines and / or jail time. If he'd controlled his passions, if he'd refused assent to these destructive impulses, his life would be different right now.  I cannot but believe he would consider that a better fate. Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: Trumpet Concerto in D major 1: Adagio by Georg Philipp Telemann

Glorious music, Ears aglow with harmonies. Listen to today's.  Thoughts: When I find a bit of joy, I love to share it. Today's music is one such discovery. I heartily encourage you (or me, years from now) to give Florence Price's piece a chance.  Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: Fantasie nègre by Florence Price

I feel it coming. The wild light of a new skin.  Unstoppable me. Thoughts: Epictetus also teaches that anxiety is caused by wanting something outside of our control. If I break the chains of external want, the ties that bind me to so much frustration, anxiety, sadness, and ire, what fresh world awaits me? Peace and tranquility. Wisdom and sureness. Stoic calm, especially in the face of tragedy, is not about not having emotions. It's not about feeling nothing. It's about acknowledging those feelings, accepting them, passing through them into a place where I can choose my action rather than unquestionably accepting their (almost always) overwrought and counter-productive demands. Turning my focus inward, to those things I can control, is hard as hell. Given many decades of experience doing exactly the wrong thing, it's a hard habit to break. But I'm making progress.  Today's Meditation: Today's Music: ' Il cavalier di Spagna' - ...

Sleep clouds my mind, thoughts They swirl round and round the drain,  Unsure where to go.  Thoughts: Perseverance, continuing a response past when the stimulus has retreated.  How often do I let myself keep going in bad behavior because I'm caught up in the moment, unable to tear myself away from the 'entertaining' passion that have caught hold of me?  Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: String Quartet in E flat major 1: Adagio ma non troppo  (to 3:42) by Fanny Mendelssohn

Songs from the 50s Spoofed beyond all measure. Fun for me and kids. Thoughts: Today's Stoic thought is about controlling anger; becoming a master of my passions instead of letting them master me. I've gotten pretty good at this. I still let my anger burst through sometimes, but those times have gotten further and further apart.  I just need to keep trying, to keep working on the ways I have to prevent outbursts. Counting to 10 or 100.   Walking away to clear my head.   Remembering that whomever I am mad at did what they did out of ignorance.   Remembering all the times I did the same thing they did.   Taking a high-level view of the action and realizing that it's not important, that in a year or a month or a week or a day or even an hour, I will look back at this and shake my head that I thought it was worth responding that way. Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: 'Che gelida manina' — 'What a frozen little hand' from ...

So high above me, She's so cool. She's my friend, my Lover, love. My wife.  Thoughts: Falling away from philosophy. That's today's Stoic thought. Absent-mindedly, or even purposely, letting my studies in philosophy and wisdom slide. Putting them off a day or two or five.  I almost didn't read that passage tonight, perhaps postponing it until tomorrow. But I didn't. I read. I'm thinking. All is good.  I'm glad I kept on top of it. It makes me feel better and helps me plan my next steps.  Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: Echorus by Philip Glass

Help!  I do not know The answer to the question. Ask!  Ye shall receive. Thoughts: A quick way to remain ignorant is to attempt to appear knowledgeable. This is something I consciously encourage in my children.  When they ask a question to learn something — How do I pronounce a word? How does that rule in the game work?  What happened in [historical event X]? — I praise them for asking the question.  Reminding them that asking questions is the best way to prevent mistakes and misunderstanding; that by always asking when they don't know something, they will end up far ahead of those who "don't want to seem dumb." I try to follow this advice, though it can be hard to break through the long-ingrained fear that my peers will think me stupid or that admitting to not knowing something is somehow embarrassing. I think I do pretty well at it, but know there's definitely room for improvement. Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: Violin Sona...

Dried, ground up words Sprinkled o'er top, spicing My thoughts with wisdom. Thoughts: Am I confused? Do the thing in front of me.  No gumption, ready to quit? Do the thing in front of me. Angry, down, or manic? Do the thing in front of me. No matter what, I can always do one thing. Forget the complexity and the urgency of the whole galaxy of cares weighing down upon me and  Do the One Thing.  Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: Trio from Act 3, Der Rosenkavalier by Richard Strauss

ABCs begun,  Elementary lessons Guide me from before.  Thoughts: Today's Stoic thought is about learning wisdom from good sources and using them as a guide to life.  Studying the examples of people from history who have both been judged as wise, but whom I myself find wise (Just because a person is held up by common approbation as an example does not mean that they are a good example for me.) Stoics fit well with my temperament. I find them easy (-er) to understand and to learn from. I find Stoic techniques natural to my mind and appropriate to my natural tendencies. I find their examples enlightening, if not always convincing.  But I do not limit myself to what comes easily.  I read things with which I disagree, which challenge me, which make me consider, and reconsider, my thoughts and opinions. Forcing myself to question what I think I know and to discover better reasons and evidence for those ideas I retain beyond their questioning. I understand to well that...

Ok. So now what? Define what is up to me.  Reserve my assent. Desire what's in my control. Follow on Nature. Use wisdom, justice, courage, Temperance in all. Thoughts: Tonight, I will spend too much money. My kids and I are going to a game. (Mrs. Student is staying home with one.) Between seats, parking, food, and drinks, it'll probably total several hundred dollars, but it's a calculated splurge: it will build memories that cannot be taken from us. It will be one more bond between us.  This is part and parcel of creating meaning. This is priceless. This is worthy. Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Meditation III: Today's Music: Symphony no. 41 in C major, K. 155 ('Jupiter'), 4: Molto Allegro by Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart Daily Shakespeare: The Merchant Of Venice , Act 3 Scene 1

Breathe.  Calm.  Close my eyes. Desperately try not to Strangle the dumbass. Thoughts: Patience is a virtue. One I need in abundance today. I must remind myself, " They do not do wrong willingly. They do so out of ignorance. " (And if they'd listened to me in the first place, I'd have no need to practice patience today.) Repeat the mantra: job security job security job security job security job security job security job security job security job security job security job security job security job security job security job security . . . . Today's Meditation: Today's Music: Unsent Love Letters  by Elena Kats-Chernin Daily Shakespeare: A Midsummer Night's Dream , Act 5 Scene 1

My luve is like a . . . Kiss for me in the morning, Like she did today. Thoughts: If I let my desires run free, I find myself with an ever-widening vista of Things I Neeeeeeed  . . . especially in these days of omnipresent, targeted advertising. Jump on Amazon to buy one thing . . . and here's 12 things I've searched for recently, some of which I may still need / want.  So easy to just add it to the cart and get that hit of dopamine two days later when the Shiny New Thing arrives. And, post-retail therapy-coitus, strangely, my unease and mood and demeanor aren't magically switched to Happy now that I have the SNT . . . . It's almost as if buying stuff isn't the cure for my malaise.  Who knew? The Stoics and Buddha and Hinduism and many others agree: desire leads to pain.  Limit or eliminate my desires, and everything takes its proper place. Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: My Luve Is Like a Red Red Ro...

Reading for knowledge. Reading for understanding. Read for mastery. Read for joy.  Thoughts: I reread books, especially those whose content I care about.  For example, I'm exploring a philosophy book with my two eldest children, Nasty, Brutish, and Short by Scott Hershovitz. We read each and discuss chapter twice, once for the big picture, once for fine details. Over all, since each kid is doing a different chapter each week, I end up reading most of them 6-7 times. I almost feel like I could restate his arguments properly.  My favorite book is Siddhartha. I've read / listened to it probably 15+ times. Every time I discover something new which I had not appreciated previously.   It's a special ritual for me . . . when I am overwhelmed, or depressed, or spirituality confused, I can return to Siddhartha and find my center, my balance.  Rereading worthy books is necessary if I want to truly appreciate their message. It's also a source of psychological comfor...

Avoiding tempters, Easily defended ground A better option. Thoughts: Sleep calls me.  I'm not sure why I'm so tired since I got enough rest last night.  Food, too, but I'm fasting this week so that's a no.  So many temptations to fight. I think discretion may be the better part of valour this evening. Time for a shower and bed.  If I'm asleep, I can't be fascinated by their charms.  Today's Meditation: Today's Music: Clarinet Concerto no. 1 in F minor, op. 73, 3: Rondo - Allegretto  (starting at 13:37) by Carl Maria von Weber

Habits and habitrails, Paths my day runs along.  Serial rails to guide my way. Thoughts: What bad habit did I curb today? How am I better? Were my actions just? How can I improve?  An age old formula, it gets straight to the point: am I better than I was when I woke up? If so, how? If not, why not? To date, my meditations have generally been promethian: I try to read in the morning and prepare myself for the day. I've not often done the retrospective evaluation of how I did. I should make that a higher priority.  Today's Meditation: Today's Music: Adagio from Lady Macbeth of the Mtsensk District arranged for strings by Dmitri Shostakovich

Ancient dragons wait. Secure in their great power. Bulwarks defend me! Thoughts: All the old impulses . . . gluttony, sloth, greed, anger, envy, lust, pride . . . lay in wait for me to sleep.  Let my focus slip and I invite them to rule my life out of instinct and weakness of will.  How do I prevent their ascendancy?  Habit. Concentrated consistency. Every day, I (do my best to) study, meditate, and journal. I carry my Stoic coin. I look for ways to practice kindness and generosity. I remind myself why I fight the tide. Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: Trauermusik by Paul Hindemith (original recording with Hindemith himself on viola) The interesting history of this piece. Worth the read. 

Hearts set to good. Phasers set to stun. Beam me up, Scotty. Buddha take the wheel. Thoughts: It's not a switch, though I've sometimes wished it were.  It's a commitment, a daily decision. It's looking for ways to practice it and finding ways to improve old practices.  It's learning and thinking and acting . It's powerful and wonderful. It's good. Today's Meditation: Today's Music: An die Musik - To Music by Franz Schubert

Happiness is found Along the path.  It's not a destination.  Thoughts: Soft humming in the other room. My child is happier today. They hum and sing to themselves when they're calm and unstressed.  It makes me smile.  Happiness, as the Buddha teaches, is the journey of life. I cannot  arrive at happiness: it's not a state of achievement, but a continual process of finding peace in how I live my life. Buddha* says this is achieved by understanding that the world, and all the things in it, are illusion. That separateness is not real. That connection to all things is reality. Stoics, on the other hand, say tranquility is found in following Nature and focusing on what is within my control. Maybe, if I continute my meditations, I will one day reach satori and all will make sense. Until then, Stoicism is my readily available course.  We shall see what the future holds.  Today's Meditation: Today's Music: Electric Counterpoint, 1: Fast by Steve R...

Building new thoughts, bright Suns of inspiration drift Through fertile mind fields.  Thoughts: Looking at Tolstoy's quotes below, it makes my heart glad that I am teaching my kids philosophy. Showing them how to think through issues and to examine their lives as teenagers will give them a head start on knowing who they are and why they are the way they are.  As I said a few days ago , aside from my love and support, I cannot think of anything more precious I could give to them.  Today's Meditation: Today's Meditation II: Today's Music: ' Dirait-on' - 'Should We Say' from Les chansons des roses by Morten Lauridsen