240128 What I learned in my studies this morning 4

Today's Meditation(s):

Watching kidlike remonstrations, it's interesting to take in my dad's behavior and try to understand the psychology behind it.

Is he reverting to the most childlike of reactions — spitting out food, resisting a change, contradicting anything and everything, etc. — from a position of spite? Is he trying to 'get even with us' for 'not taking him home' or something similar? Maybe. He sometimes seems so distant, and his eyes so empty, I might mistake it for annihilation. Other times, he's right there, staring back at me from five inches away.

I also wonder how much I project onto his canvas. Which of my fears are expressed in my imagined versions of his motivations?

I wished again last night that I'd studied Stoic thought with him. Then perhaps the same Stoic thoughts which help me might also help him. And it's too late to introduce them now.